So sorry, Dan, it sounds like you have been through so many terrible life happenings. Your wife's family sounds messed up (put that together with a big head and a title) and that would always be plaguing you, but don't let it get your self esteem. Petty people like to put nice people down.
If you can take a break with your fam in Canada for a while, it will help you process things. I was a JW for 60 years, and when we had a pedophile in our hall I got to see another side to the WT. I found out things others are just coming to see. Look up the Australian Royal Commission, and their looking into JWs in that country. WT lawyers are not "righteous", they are lawyers, worse than 'worldly' lawyers, because they use every trick in the book and have no conscience about it.
Just take time to build yourself up, feel good, connect with people who love you. No one should have to have gone through what you did. Unfortunately, so many on this website have gone through the same things that you have. Your story is repeated the world over. It is not just one 'group of elders' or 'one congregation', it is an organization wide problem. It hurts people. Let yourself breathe.
Like Driveby said, maybe you should make sure you have a 'witness' (not a JW) with you when you visit your wife or daughter. Her family sound like the kind that will just make trouble for you and have no remorse.
The WT says one thing, and does another.... as you shall soon discover. Take care, and please let us know how it goes. You are a good person, who deserves to have a good life.
cha ching